I’ve read some interesting conversations this weekend: Authors talking to their younger selves: Candy Gourlay’s touching reassurance to her 17 year old self on Dear Teen Me and Teri Terry’s excited chat with her teen self about the upcoming launch of her first novel Slated over on Notes From The Slush Pile.
I thought I’d quite like a chat with my 17 year old self. Turned out she was busy writing haiku’s. And quoting Bertolt Brecht. And rehearsing for a really important play thank you. I left her to it. I didn’t really have much to say to her anyway – she was quite irritating and I know she figures things out eventually. Gives up one dream and takes up another.
The same dream the 43 year old me is still having. That…hang on… maybe the 63 year old me could answer some questions on….?!
43yome: Hello, excuse me, sorry to interrupt, have you got 5 minutes?
63yome: You look familiar?
43 yome: I’m you from 20 years ago. I was wondering if we could have a chat.
63y0me: Quickly then, I’m snowed under today. Tea? Redbush right? Ah no- it’s morning – stand-your-spoon-in-builders.
43yome: That would be great, shall I hold the baby? Oh, she’s gorgeous!
63yome: That’s our newest grandchild, there are two more outside.
43yome looking out the window: That one starting the camp fire has to be Archie’s.
63yome: Nope, Emily’s. Her twin is on the playhouse roof. I think you better leave them be though, you look rather too like their mother.
43yome: How’s she doing?
63yome: She’s good, she’s in Greece at the moment, doing some work for the IMF.
We share a smile of pride.
43yome: And Archie? Is he happy?
63yome: He’s out on a tractor somewhere.
43yome: He’s happy then. Maybe I could see him?
63yome shaking her head: I know why you’re here. You want to know if the book deal ever happens, right?
I do an embarrassed sideways nod. I don’t know why, of all people who should understand, she should.
63yome: Which book were you thinking of?
43yome: I don’t care, any of them! Mouse? Does he make it? What about Laura and Shem? Maybe not the current one, its a bitch to rewrite, every time I go through it I see more faults. I’m starting to hate it.
63yome: You’ve just got to be patient.
43yome: I’ve been patient for the last 15 years.
63yome: Ok, you’ve got to be patient and spent less time on the internet. Now drink your tea and get back to work. I’ve got an editorial meeting this afternoon.
43yome: An editorial meeting?! Yes!!! I punch the air.
63yome: Don’t get too excited, you’re no J.K. Rowling, and for heaven’s sake, do your pelvic floor exercises. And moisturise, OK? It’s not difficult.
Kathryn Evans 
BRILLIANT! And I like the advice to moisturize. And I’m sure you won’t look like that in 20 years!!!! But seriously Kathy, you’re gonna get there. You’re such a brilliant writer!
I love you x
Candy beat me to it: you will definitely be a more gorgeous 63 year old. Can’t wait to see if you were right about the kids.
What I’d like to know is: will you still be belly dancing? And how goes farming in the Republic of Selsey?
Oh she’ll definitely still be belly dancing. And fencing! Thanks Nancy ;o) x
“Her twin is on the playhouse roof.” You are a calm granny.
63 years of dealing with my two.
Might be different when they are theirs! eek!
Loved the pelvic floor thing – and what the others said – you will NOT look like that in 2 decades. Though you may live on an island by then.
yes we may well be beach front!
You forgot to ask if there will even be books in 20 years time! But whatever form they take, I’m sure you’ll be right in there telling stories and making readers smile, then gasp, then smile again.
Of course there’ll be books in 20 years time! There’ll probably be a book revival ;o)
Brilliant brilliant brilliant!
From one funny girl to another – That ending was a great punchline! You will make it and you will DEFINITELY not look like that in 20 years.
Hee hee! I hope not.